It’s very difficult to have a successful marriage without training.
Marriages fall into any of these three categories:
1. Happy: There’s fun and chemistry between the partners. This is a union of two forgiving people.
2. Ordinary : These are marriages that are just there. Without color and flavor; just bland. They’re pretenders. If they’re not intentional, they’re on their way to a troubled marriage.
3. Troubled
Marry your friend. This is the person you’re most comfortable with.
Most people invest more in what will attract spouses than in what will keep the spouse.
A happy marriage has rules of engagement. No matter how angry you are, there are things you can’t say. You understand that your children’s future must be protected and can’t fight everywhere.
Fighting styles:
1. Talk: watch the things you say.
2. Silent treatment: they will keep malice with you.
3. Defensive: they respond with attack.
4. Manipulative
5. Deflection: this is a major trademark of people that are narcissistic. They gaslight you.
If couples have the fruit of the spirit, there won’t be divorce (Galatians 5:32). Let the fruit of the spirit be the way you fight.
Don’t run your marriage on culture. Run it on scripture. Culture is not the standard. Go into marriage prepared to serve your spouse. A marriage is mutual service.